Top Ten ways to get that promotion you've been wishing for
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There's a fine line between fawning over your co-workers (being an obvious kiss-ass that everyone hates) and becoming the most popular, successful grunt in the cubicle maze. Follow these top ten tips to make your way to the top of the heap, and still get kissed at the office Christmas party!
Buy snacks regularly, and share them with everyone in your department
Don't buy enough for everyone every time. Instead, buy a couple of extra pastries, and subtly take turns sharing with two or three people, so that they feel singled out and special.
Under-promise and over-deliver
If you're pretty sure you can get that report finished by tomorrow afternoon, then promise your boss that it'll be done the day after tomorrow. When you casually turn it in early, you'll make major points.
Be consistent
It's no good to do something amazing this week, and then sit on your butt next week. Being consistent is vital if you want your boss to trust you.
Be honest when you're ignorant
No-one likes a know-it-all. If you don't know how to do something, ask someone. And use the internet, for goodness' sake!
Try to avoid office romances
Besides being distracting, they also tend to go wrong quite often. Do you really want to have to pass your ex in the hall every morning, awkwardly trying to avoid their gaze?
Pick up the slack
If something needs to be done, get in there and do it. The words, "That's not my job" have never yet led anyone to success.
Keep your moods for your private life
Nobody you work with cares if you're feeling hormonal or grump, or you had a fight with your girlfriend. Moods are a luxury you cannot afford at work. Suck it up, stick a smile on your face, and wait until you get home to have your breakdown.
Be innovative
Develop habits that will allow your creative side to shine. Nurture your innate curiosity and problem solving ability at the workplace. Jot down your ideas for future reference, and don't be afraid to take risks and make some mistakes. Allow yourself to "think outside the box" and explore ideas your co-workers are ignoring.
Don't be a smart-ass
If you make your boss feel stupid, you turn yourself into a threat. Figure out how to make useful suggestions without sneering at the way it's being done at the moment. For all you know, that stupid process is the sweet baby brainchild of your brain-dead boss!
Fake it 'til you make it
Yes, it's true. If you ACT confident, and you pretend you like the people around you, then there's a 99% chance that they'll believe it.
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